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WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO BE THIS WAY?

The Advantages of Being Transgendered

April 7, 2004

Why would anyone want to be this way? Wouldn't life have been easier for me if I had been born "normal" and did not have to worry about this? How could I welcome such a "curse"?

It may appear obvious to the uninitiated that no one would want to be transgendered, and that the unfortunate person is suffering from a terrible curse or disease. Upon looking into it more carefully, one may find that this conclusion is a false one. Approaching it from the positive side, a radically different conclusion results. Am I not fortunate that I have had the opportunity to experience life from the viewpoints of both genders? How many people are able to experience this? Far from being a curse, this condition is a gift.

In some ways, life would have been easier if I had been happy in my own skin and never had to deal with this problem. There have been difficulties on the way, but would it have been better to be "normal"? If I had not been forced to deal directly with the basic nature of my personality, I might be living in some kind of haze, moving through life without thinking about anything. Or perhaps something else would have come along to force me into serious self-reflection. I will never know. When a person fits in with a group and naturally gravitates towards some accepted ideal, the opportunities for pursuing an understanding of the self are rather sparse. It takes difficulties to jolt a person out of a sense of complacency. Transgenderism has provided me with such a difficulty, and with it a golden opportunity.

In the two years or so since I started my adventure down the path of the transsexual, I have had numerous occasions to stop and reflect on who I am and what I need to do with my life. I have challenged basic assumptions to the core, and my self-knowledge has grown accordingly. In a sense, I have now jumped on a spiritual path to enlightenment. But this is not an exploration of the supernatural; it is an exploration of the self. Spirituality, first and foremost, is the understanding of the self.

I have had the opportunity to live as a man. It did not work very well; that role did not suit me, but I am happy for that opportunity as I have learned a great deal from it. Now, I have the opportunity to live out the rest of my life as a woman. The role suits me better, and I am happier now, and it gives me new chances to learn. However, I would not trade my experiences as a man for a more contented life as a genetic woman. Living in a role that did not work for me caused me to question and challenge everything about myself, whereas if I had been contented from the start, I might have become complacent and I would have been set back on the path to enlightenment. I now come to the proper gender role with an open mind and the benefit of my unique experiences.

Discovering that one is a transsexual is a jolt which can cause one to embark on a spiritual journey. It is certainly not the only one; any massive change in life can cause this. Perhaps if not for this, something else would have happened and the result would be similar; religious conversion, a forced change of career, the sudden loss of a loved one, serious illness, a serious accident, or any number of other pivotal events can provide the necessary spark. But transsexualism is an especially unique call to spiritual action, and I believe it is the right one for me. It fits well with my desire to be different.

Now why do I actually like being this way? All the reasons presented in this article apply. It has made my life more difficult, but it has also made it immeasurably richer. The reward is well worth the cost.


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