The Corporate Ladder
- Chairman of the Board
- Leaps tall buildings in a single bound.
- Is more powerful than a locomotive.
- Is faster than a speeding bullet.
- Walks on water.
- Gives policy to God.
- President
- Leaps short buildings in a single bound.
- Is more powerful than a switch engine.
- Is just as fast as a speeding bullet.
- Walks on water if the sea is calm.
- Talks with God.
- Executive Vice President
- Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds.
- Is almost as powerful as a switch engine.
- Is faster than a speeding BB.
- Walks on water in an indoor swimming pool.
- Talks with God if a special request is approved.
- Vice President
- Barely clears a Quonset hut.
- Loses tug-of-war with a locomotive.
- Can fire a speeding bullet.
- Swims well.
- Is occasionally addressed by God.
- General Manager
- Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap buildings.
- Is run over by a locomotive.
- Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury.
- Dog paddles.
- Talks to animals.
- Manager
- Runs into buildings.
- Recognizes locomotive two out of three times.
- Is not issued ammunition.
- Can't stay afloat with a life preserver.
- Talks to walls.
- Trainee
- Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings.
- Says "Look at the choo-choo."
- Wets himself with a water pistol.
- Plays in mud puddles.
- Mumbles to himself.
- Secretary
- Lifts buildings and walks under them.
- Kicks locomotives off the tracks.
- Catches speeding bullets in her teeth and eats them.
- Freezes water with a single glance.
- She IS God...
