Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys
Director: Ted Nicolau
Written by: Courtney Joyner
Weapon of Choice: Iron Maiden
Based upon: none
Other movies in this series:
Puppet Master II
Puppet Master III: Toulon's Revenge
Dollman vs. Demonic Toys
Puppet Master 4
Puppet Master 5: The Final Chapter
Curse of the Puppet Master
Retro Puppet Master
The tyranist's thoughts
I'd say that it's sad to see Corey Feldman sink this low, but the truth is that he was making excrement such as this while he could still have been considered a celebrity. I would, however, like to take a moment to say goodbye to a long time favourite, Full Moon studios. This is the first movie featuring property that used to be Full Moon's but isn't anymore. It is a sad day for me and I'd like to think that if Charles Band were still steering the ship, something this horrible would never have been made.
So one of the unending line of Toulon descendants and his daughter are trying to resurrect the dolls. For some reason. That isn't clear. At all. Meanwhile, across town, the company that pumps out our Demonic Toys, wants the Toulon secret. Commence petty squabbling and a lot of doll on doll violence. Actually, now that I think about it, I don't think the dolls ever actually fight each other. That would have been much more interesting.
Oddly enough, it is the Toulon daughter, played ably by Danielle Keaton, who carries most of the movie for me. And she's really just a supporting character to Feldman's Toulon and Vanessa Angel's Erica Sharpe. Feldman was miscast as he still looks like a teenager. Angel is just horrible. Really Keaton is the only thing going here.
Even worse than the acting, though, is the dialogue. There's a difference between not taking yourself seriously and writing crap. This is crap.
There's probably no reason to see this one. Especially since it was made-for-TV. In fact, even if you liked any of the other movies, just stay away.
Posted: December 27, 2004
As Patsy Cline once taught us, sometimes it's hard to be a woman.
Well, the years working on this website have taught me an important lesson as well: sometimes it's hard to be a movie reviewer.
As a kid, watching Siskel and Ebert (and Jeffrey Lyons and that royal tool Rex Reed), I imagined it would be fun to be a movie critic, paid to go to the theatre (the most magical place on earth), eat popcorn, and see all the films I wanted for free. I never considered the possibility of having to see all the films I did not want as well.
Take Puppet Master Versus Demonic Toys, for instance. I don't have much to add, beyond what tyranist said. He's right, really.
I don't hate Corey Feldman. I laugh at him, but I don't hate him. This film, though, was nearly enough to make me hate him. Seeing Feldman pretend to be a middle-aged father was only slightly more believable than White Chicks. Ted Nicolau, who made several really great flicks for Full Moon Pictures, must have sleptwalked his way through this one. Blindfolded. In a single weekend. If a child murderer was sentenced to watch Puppet Master Versus Demonic Toys, Amnesty International would surely intercede.
Ahhh, it wasn't THAT bad. I don't know why I exaggerate. But it did suck, I won't lie to you there.
I don't really even know if there was the potential for a good movie in this one. Hmmm. Maybe. But somebody somewhere sure screwed up. Maybe it was the Sci-Fi Channel.
Whoever it was deserves some payback.
Posted: January 4, 2005
Total Skulls: 29
|Rips off earlier film|
|Horror film showing on TV/in theater in movie|
|Future celebrity appears|
|Former celebrity appears||Corey Feldman|
|Girl unnecessarily gets naked|
|Death associated with sex|
|Unfulfilled promise of nudity|
|Characters forget about threat|
|Power is cut|
|Phone lines are cut|
|Someone investigates a strange noise|
|Someone runs up stairs instead of going out front door|
|Camera is the killer|
|Victims cower in front of a window/door|
|Victim locks self in with killer|
|Victim running from killer inexplicably falls|
|Toilet stall scene|
|Car stalls or won't start|
|Cat jumps out|
|Stupid discovery of corpse|
|No one believes only witness|
|Crazy, drunk, old man knows the truth|
|Warning goes unheeded|
|Music detracts from scene|
|Death in first five minutes|
|x years before/later|
|Dark and stormy night|
|Killer doesn't stay dead|
|Killer wears a mask|
|Killer is in closet|
|Killer is in car with victim|
|Villain is more sympathetic than heroes|
|Blood spatters - camera, wall, etc.|
|Poor death effect|
|No one dies at all|
|Little kid lamely survives|
|Dog/Pet miraculously survives|
|"It was all a dream" ending|
|Unbelievably happy ending|
|Unbelievably crappy ending|
|What the hell?|