PRESIDENT KIMBALL:
Marriage is part of a
normal life sequence. Missionaries should begin to
think marriage when they return from their missions, to begin to
get
acquainted with many young women so that they will have a better
basis for
selection of a life's companion, and when the times comes, they
should
marry in the holy temple and have their families, and complete their
education, establish themselves in a profitable and rewarding occupation,
and give themselves to their families, the gospel, and the Church.
Marriage should not defer
to education. For a young man to get his mission
two years and then four to six to eight years of university training,
the
way must look long and forbidding. When the times demand highly
trained
people; when keen competition requires extended education; when
ambition
and desire push one toward multiple degrees; when family and friends
expect
great accomplishment; when the wealth and renown of those who have
become
highly trained loom haughtily up before the beginner, it must indeed
take a
stout heart to let wisdom and propriety rule.
This often brings a rather
natural, but not always justified, delay and
postponement of marriage and there seems to be an increasing number
who
abandon the idea of marriage.
There will be many excuses,
of course: "I could not support a wife and go
to college." "I could not have children and maintain myself in school."
"I
thought it would be proper to wait a few years for my marriage and
my
children." What the Lord will say to these excuses we can
only imagine. We
are sure he will at least say, "You have not placed first
things first."
Book: Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball
PRESIDENT EZRA TAFT BENSON:
God has a timetable—a
sequence or season for good things. A mission, when
its time has arrived, takes priority over marriage and education.
And when
one is mature enough and has found the right companion, marriage
should not
be delayed for education. While all three—mission, marriage,
and
education—are essential, there is a proper order to follow.
("In His Steps," Church Educational System Devotional,
Anaheim, California, 8 February 1987.)
Also, the need for education
or material things does not justify the
postponing of children in order to keep the wife working as the
breadwinner
in the family. I remember the counsel of our beloved prophet
Spencer W.
Kimball to married students. He said: "I have told tens
of thousands of
young folks that when they marry they should not wait for children
until
they have finished their schooling and financial desires . . . they
should
live together normally and let children come . . . I know of no
scripture
where an authorization is given to young wives to withhold their
families
and go to work to put their husbands through school. There
are thousands of
husbands who have worked their own way through school and have reared
families at the same tame."
("Marriage Is Honorable," in 1973 Speeches of the Year
[Provo, Utah: BYU, 1974], p. 263.)
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