All About Preachers

If a guy couldn't make it at any of the trades we've talked about, either because he was lazy, shiftless, dishonest, weak chinned, eyes too close together, or whatever reason; if he couldn't make it at an honest trade, he might have decided to become a preacher. He'd get himself a phony certificate from some outfit in the East that would certify him as a preacher, and open a tent show or get himself a congregation in a small town.

There never was any love lost between the working class in the West and the preachers. You could always tell what side the preacher was standing on when it came to a showdown between the boss and the working people. After that mine caves in, and all the miners are brought out and taken over to the burying ground, and all the widows are down there with their little kids, here comes the old preacher with his black coat and his book, and he's telling them, "It's all in God's great plan. We will all be united on the other side." What he's doing is getting the boss off the hook for his damned unsafe and lethal mine.

I guess this is a bitter and a sarcastic song, and the sentiments it expresses are not just historical. They're largely my own.

Preacher paid a visit to a poor old man,
Said, "I'm going to save you from your mortal sin,"
Old man asked the preacher his sins to relate,
"You didn't put nothin' in the Sunday plate."

Preacher paid a visit to Widow Brown,
Lived with her kids on the edge of town;
Preacher got there when dinner was on,
Sneaked out just about an hour till dawn.

Preacher preached a sermon by an open graveside,
Where a hundred coal miners were buried alive;
He said, "It's all in God's great plan, "
Preacher and the boss were a-shakin' hands.

Preacher man, preacher, you better watch out,
We're gonna get together and run you out;
All you ever preach is shame and greed,
One Big Union is all we need.

Final Chorus: Sexton, sexton, ring the bell,
Old preacher man's on his way to hell;
Sexton, sexton, ring it out loud,
We'll all stand together with our heads unbowed.

Copyright ©1973, 2000 Bruce Phillips

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