CarnosaurYear: 1993 Director: Adam Simon Written by: Adam Simon Threat: Lizard Weapon of Choice: Claws |
Other movies in this series:
Carnosaur 2
Carnosaur 3: Primal Species
Rish Outfield's reviews
Terrible, terrible, and, let's see...terrible. Look, Roger Corman can't be
blamed for making exploitative and derivative trash (he's been doing it for
forty years and is still going strong), but they need never be this boring.
This must have made money (there was a thunder lizard craze that year),
because they made about a dozen sequels, but I don't think I'll ever rent
them, this was so couldn't-stand-ably bad. Mediocre at its highest point, no
one in the cast was ever memorable, and I never cared about any of the
characters (or the monster, for that matter). I liked Jennifer Runyon in 18
Again, Ghostbusters, and the first season of "Charles In Charge" (hey, I
know my stuff), but she was just sad here. Everybody was awful.
Occasionally the dinosaur looked really good, but the 'same' dino was
pathetically fake in the next shot, even looking like a different species. I
don't know how good the sequels are (and I may never find out), since their
predecessor was so horribly bad. Bizarrely, the cover boasts a "Thumbs Up!"
rating by Gene Siskel. He must have seen it at a Drive-In with someone
considerably hotter than Roger Ebert. This was endlessly talky, disjointed,
pointless and frustrating. Listen, a monster movie, whatever else it is,
should be fun. And this just wasn't.
Best Scare: I've seen more scares and tension in an episode of "Pee Wee's Playhouse."
I'd Recommend It To: Nobody. Why would I?
The tyranist's thoughts
Simply one of the most terrible movies I have ever seen. I have to admit that it was pretty late when we watched it and I
did have a hard time staying awake through it, but when I told Rish it had seemed really disconnected and poorly edited he
agreed. He stayed awake the entire time. The effects were bad, but what do you expect from a Roger Corman movie. The plot
was abominable. They didn't dwell on a single character long enough for us to learn a name let alone begin to sympathize and
identify with them. There were new characters introduced at random only to be killed or forgotten within moments. The plot
was confusing in the way it jumped from place to place and person to person without any kind of intelligence. The ending
just blew. I guess you could say I really hated this movie and that is unusual for me. I am willing to forgive quite a bit.
There are many movies I dislike but I can almost always come up with at least one thing that is redeeming about the movie.
There isn't a single thing redeeming about this movie. In fact, this is one of the only times that I think it will take years
for me to be willing to see the sequels, and even then you should probably club me first to short circuit my memory.
Total Skulls: 26
Sequel | ||
Sequel setup | ||
Rips off earlier film | ||
Horror film showing on TV/in theater in movie | ||
Future celebrity appears | ||
Former celebrity appears | ||
Bad title | ||
Bad premise | ||
Bad acting | ||
Bad dialogue | ||
Bad execution | ||
MTV Editing | ||
OTS | ||
Girl unnecessarily gets naked | ||
Wanton sex | ||
Death associated with sex | ||
Unfulfilled promise of nudity | ||
Characters forget about threat | ||
Secluded location | ||
Power is cut | ||
Phone lines are cut | ||
Someone investigates a strange noise | ||
Someone runs up stairs instead of going out front door | ||
Camera is the killer | ||
Victims cower in front of a window/door | ||
Victim locks self in with killer | ||
Victim running from killer inexplicably falls | ||
Toilet stall scene | ||
Shower scene | ||
Car stalls or won't start | ||
Cat jumps out | ||
Fake scare | ||
Laughable scare | ||
Stupid discovery of corpse | ||
Dream sequence | ||
No one believes only witness | ||
Crazy, drunk, old man knows the truth | ||
Music detracts from scene | ||
Death in first five minutes | ||
What the hell? | ||
x years ago . . . | ||
Dark and stormy night | ||
Killer doesn't stay dead | ||
Killer wears a mask | ||
Killer is in closet | ||
Killer is in car with victim | ||
Villain is more sympathetic than heroes | ||
Unscary villain/monster | ||
Beheading | ||
Blood fountain | ||
Blood hits camera | ||
Poor death effect | ||
Excessive gore | ||
No one dies at all | ||
Virgin survives | ||
Geek/Nerd survives | ||
Little kid lamely survives | ||
Dog/Pet miraculously survives | ||
Unresolved subplots | ||
"It was all a dream" ending | ||
Unbelievably happy ending | ||
Unbelievably crappy ending |