Ghosts of MarsYear: 2001 Director: John Carpenter Written by: Larry Sulkis, John Carpenter Threat: Ghosts Weapon of Choice: Guns Based upon: Original |
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Rish Outfield's reviews
I once said that John Carpenter makes great, but unsatisfying films. In the case
of Ghosts of Mars, he definitely got one of those two. In a way, it's like a Sci-Fi remake of Assault On Precinct 13, only not
nearly as good.
Tyranist explains the story in his review, except to say that rapper Ice-T played the
criminal everyone suspects for the murders. The cast was interesting, with some
familiar faces. I like Natasha Henstridge. I suppose anybody with eyes will tell you the same thing,
so that's not much of a statement. I'm not much of an Ice-T fan, and this film didn't help that any.
It won't be surprising that I found his character a little hard to like, but a lot of Carpenter's characters
are flawed. Snake Plissken certainly was. James Woods in Vampires.
Roddy Piper battled someone for half an hour over whether he'd put on a pair of glasses or
not. I suppose there would be some viewers that thought Ice-T was a good anti-hero.
But there's more to a successful character besides a pissed-off look and surly attitude.
I'm not entirely sure what it is that was wrong with Ghosts of Mars. It wasn't
scary, by any means, and it wasn't funny, though a moment or two certainly tried.
It wasn't even all that action-packed, as I found myself struggling to stay awake,
even in the climactic train sequence. The special effects were okay, nothing to write back to
Earth about, though. It had some interesting ideas (such as the matriarchal society on
Mars, and a creature that possesses a host until it dies, then jumps to the next one), but didn't
seem to use them in a constructive way. It was a lot of macho swaggering and violence,
but I didn't care about the characters (in fact, when one of them died, rather violently
and off-screen, my reaction was "Oh. Did that happen?" and nothing more). The chief
villain of the piece (tyranist explained that his name was Big Daddy Mars, as if I needed
another reason not to like the film) was ridiculous-looking, completely not frightening, and
more obnoxious than anything else. He kind of reminded me of the lead singer from Dead
or Alive (if he were to work out, pierce himself several times, and come back from the
grave), but Big Daddy Mars didn't even come close to spinning me right round like a record.
The movie simply wasn't very good. No surprise considering how Carpenter has
fared lately. But it should have been better.
The tyranist's thoughts
Typical and almost formulaic Carpenter. It's too bad that he hasn't come up with anything
truly original for a few years. Still, Natasha Henstridge isn't hard to look at.
So Mars has been partially colonised and is mostly occupied by miners. There's been an
outbreak of unusual behavior and severe death at a few colonies. Most people are blaming
it on one man, but a team sent in to bring him back.
I've been a fan of Carpenter's for a long time, but even I have to admit that this was pretty
sub-par. I'm sure it was pitched as Escape from New York on Mars. While I liked
some of the characters and I dug on the sci-fi feel of the movie, it was clear from the purpose
that kicking ass and not much else was the point of the movie. The plot just doesn't hold up
much in spite of what I thought was a good backstory. Perhaps a little more context would
have helped some.
Carpenter fans might want to see this as it is pretty typical of him. On the other hand, they
might be terribly disappointed.
Total Skulls: 14
Sequel | ||
Sequel setup | ||
Rips off earlier film | ||
Horror film showing on TV/in theater in movie | ||
Future celebrity appears | ||
Former celebrity appears | ||
Bad title | ||
Bad premise | ||
Bad acting | ||
Bad dialogue | ||
Bad execution | ||
MTV Editing | ||
OTS | ||
Girl unnecessarily gets naked | ||
Wanton sex | ||
Death associated with sex | ||
Unfulfilled promise of nudity | ||
Characters forget about threat | ||
Secluded location | ||
Power is cut | ||
Phone lines are cut | ||
Someone investigates a strange noise | ||
Someone runs up stairs instead of going out front door | ||
Camera is the killer | ||
Victims cower in front of a window/door | ||
Victim locks self in with killer | ||
Victim running from killer inexplicably falls | ||
Toilet stall scene | ||
Shower/bath scene | ||
Car stalls or won't start | ||
Cat jumps out | ||
Fake scare | ||
Laughable scare | ||
Stupid discovery of corpse | ||
Dream sequence | ||
Hallucination/Vision | ||
No one believes only witness | ||
Crazy, drunk, old man knows the truth | ||
Warning goes unheeded | ||
Music detracts from scene | ||
Death in first five minutes | ||
x years before/later | ||
Flashback sequence | ||
Dark and stormy night | ||
Killer doesn't stay dead | ||
Killer wears a mask | ||
Killer is in closet | ||
Killer is in car with victim | ||
Villain is more sympathetic than heroes | ||
Unscary villain/monster | ||
Beheading | ||
Blood fountain | ||
Blood hits camera | ||
Poor death effect | ||
Excessive gore | ||
No one dies at all | ||
Virgin survives | ||
Geek/Nerd survives | ||
Little kid lamely survives | ||
Dog/Pet miraculously survives | ||
Unresolved subplots | ||
"It was all a dream" ending | ||
Unbelievably happy ending | ||
Unbelievably crappy ending | ||
What the hell? |