House II: The Second Story

Year: 1987

Director: Ethan Wiley

Written by: Ethan Wiley

Threat: Undead

Weapon of Choice: Shotgun

Based upon: nothing

IMDb page: IMDb link

      House II 

Other movies in this series:
House
House IV

The tyranist's thoughts
I really liked House. It was inventive and fun and pretty different for a haunted house movie. It was made in the '80s which is always a bonus and partook fully of that great decade. Then they decided to make a sequel and much like most sequels to '80s horror, they decided that it needed to be funnier rather than scarier. This has been done well a couple times in cases like Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night 2 and Sleepaway Camp II: Unhappy Campers. More often it's been done poorly. This movie falls into the latter category.
So another guy has inherited the house. He shows up and immediately, odd things happen that all tie back to one of his ancestors and a Mexican crystal skull. Well, they go up the hill to the cemetery and dig great-grandpa up only to discover that the skull (which was conveniently in the casket with him) attracts more than a few undesirable types, the evillest of which is great-grandpa's former partner-in-crime.
Filled with fake scares and bad '80s gags, this movie fails on nearly every level. Even the totally hot girlfriend isn't that hot at all. It's like they thought that making a sequel just meant easy money. About the only interesting thing about the movie (which was written and directed by the writer of the first one) is that somewhere along the line they decided that if the first had George Wendt, the second desperately needed John Ratzenberger. Hmm. Does a cast-member of cheers really make a horror movie that much better? Okay, I'll give you Bebe Neuwirth, but she's the exception.
As you might be able to tell, I really didn't care for this one. It was unfunny and really pretty tedious. I suppose if you are some sort of weird completist, you'll want to see it, but if you listen to me, you'll skip it.

Total Skulls: 18

Sequel skull
Sequel setup
Rips off earlier film
Horror film showing on TV/in theater in movie
Future celebrity appears skull Bill Maher
Former celebrity appears
Bad title skull
Bad premise skull
Bad acting
Bad dialogue
Bad execution
MTV Editing
OTS
Girl unnecessarily gets naked
Wanton sex
Death associated with sex
Unfulfilled promise of nudity
Characters forget about threat skull
Secluded location
Power is cut
Phone lines are cut
Someone investigates a strange noise skull
Someone runs up stairs instead of going out front door
Camera is the killer
Victims cower in front of a window/door
Victim locks self in with killer
Victim running from killer inexplicably falls
Toilet stall scene
Shower/bath scene
Car stalls or won't start
Cat jumps out
Fake scare skullskull
Laughable scare
Stupid discovery of corpse
Dream sequence
Hallucination/Vision
No one believes only witness
Crazy, drunk, old man knows the truth
Warning goes unheeded
Music detracts from scene
Death in first five minutes skull
x years before/later skull
Flashback sequence
Dark and stormy night
Killer doesn't stay dead skull
Killer wears a mask
Killer is in closet
Killer is in car with victim
Villain is more sympathetic than heroes
Unscary villain/monster
Beheading skull
Blood fountain
Blood spatters - camera, wall, etc.
Poor death effect
Excessive gore
No one dies at all
Virgin survives skull
Geek/Nerd survives skull
Little kid lamely survives
Dog/Pet miraculously survives
Unresolved subplots
"It was all a dream" ending
Unbelievably happy ending skull
Unbelievably crappy ending skull
What the hell? skullskull