Rish Outfield's reviews
What an awful movie. What a waste of good talent, too.
My friends, this is no fun. All the good scares happen within the first twenty minutes, and the ending is just groan-out-loud stupid. I went in, wondering how scared I would be for the drive home, and walked out swearing. The beginning showed promise: an eccentric multi-millionaire throws a birthday party for his wife in a refurbished mental institution that has a horrible, twisted history. Once the guests arrive, some kind of waste product matter hits the fan. Then it all goes downhill pretty darn quick.
I hated this movie. The first film from Robert Zemeckis and Joel Silver's production company, Dark Castle, almost makes me hope there are no more. And it had such an amazingly attractive cast (of course, I can't say that helped): Famke Janssen (boy, she's everywhere!) was good as the cold, heartless wife of a heartless, cold man. Geoffrey Rush played Stephen Price, the amusement park king, who traded insulting quips with his wife and openly despised her. Still, I didn't hate him, nor could I. The movie was just a piece of crap. Bridgette Wilson did nothing for me--I preferred the other girl, but really, I would have preferred a nap. Chris Kattan was funny at first, but then wore on and on. It was all so stupid. I've fallen and I can't get up.
Wow, I've completely lost control of this review. I'd better quit while I'm only this far behind.
Note: For folks who actually enjoy this kind of mean-spirited, sick, horror, I suggest you stay to the end of the credits for an eye-ful of even more perverse footage.

The tyranist's thoughts
I went into this one expecting a mediocre attempt at a haunted house movie and found something much more terrifying. I was well satisfied. That is probably the best way to put it. I have often ranted about the difficulty of making a good haunted house film and how many there are that simply suck. This one is probably the best haunted house movie that I have ever seen. Now, don't get me wrong. It had its share of problems and was less than perfect, but it was a lot of fun to watch and worth the time spent in a darkened theatre. The cast is amazingly sympathetic and fun to scream with. There are moments in which most of them are jerks, but in the end you want the humans to win. You want the humans to escape the unutterable evil. Its good that way. I especially liked the Ali Larter character, Sara. But then I've liked Ali since Varsity Blues (okay, that's the only movie I've ever seen her in). Also watch for the cameo by Lisa Loeb (as much as I hate her, she's easy to spot). I would recommend seeing this at least once, in a theatre, with friends who love horror.