Rish Outfield's reviews
I remember the first time I read "The Mangler" in Stephen King's Night Shift. I was thinking, "Gosh, this guy can make swell scary stories about anything!" Okay, maybe I didn't say "swell," but King has a way of making common objects and places (a toilet stall, a hotel room, a can of beer, an old car, a local swimming hole, a bathroom sink, and even a washing machine) ominous and malevolent. The problem is, a lot of the convincing is in our own minds–-we read the stories and we create the images, CHOOSING to believe because we only see it in our heads. When a story like this is put on film, there's a challenge in getting the audience to believe what they see, to cajole them into suspending the disbelief they willingly set aside while reading a story.
A detective investigates a death at the local industrial laundry–-a woman was chewed up by a monstrous old folding machine, and not the first victim either. The evil old owner of the laundry (Robert Englund) knows more than he lets on, and when the truth is revealed, the blood (and convolution) really flows.
I think I have heard universally that this movie sucks. So, why did I rent it? I don't know.* While I didn't find it to be the worst movie ever, or even the worst King adaptation, it had an awful lot of weak points--too many characters, too many subplots, too long, the CGI (the bane of the 90's) was bad as usual, Englund looked ridiculous in his absurd getup and absolutely terrible old age makeup, and it starred Silence of the Lambs's Ted Levine-–one of the most dislikable lead actors I've ever seen-–as the GOOD GUY, for Pete's sake. The script was just flawed, with its black magic hokum and a complete dearth of logic. The kooky neighbour must've had nine pages of near-indiscernible dialogue. There weren't any scares that I can recall, though there was a neat moment with haunted icebox, and the titular mechanism was pretty frightening. It had kind of a cool ending–-unexpected, at least. And when you see a lot of horror films, you start to appreciate the unexpected. It was directed by Tobe Texas Chainsaw Hooper, who hasn't made a good movie in fifteen years. I'm not at all a fan (even though his name is attached to Poltergeist), but I do admire the fact that he still makes Horror films all these years later.
The Mangler was gross-–really gross. I watched the Unrated version, but it was still quite a shock. The gorrific folding death of Englund's character was so graphically violent that a soulless gorehound like me had to turn away in revulsion. And, there was vomiting in this movie. I remember, back in ‘86 or ‘87, the local paper started adding Vomiting to the list of offenses on its movie review page (where a movie like Stand By Me or The Witches of Eastwick would be Rated R for "language, vulgarity, violence, and vomiting"). I have no comment about that, I'm just remembering.
I'd Recommend It To: Real die-hard Stephen King or Robert Englund fans only.
*I did it for you, Damien, all for you!

Total Skulls: 11

Sequel
Sequel setup
Rips off earlier film
Horror film showing on TV/in theater in movie
Future celebrity appears
Former celebrity appears
Bad title
Bad premise
Bad acting
Bad dialogue
Bad execution
MTV Editing
OTS
Girl unnecessarily gets naked
Wanton sex
Death associated with sex
Unfulfilled promise of nudity
Characters forget about threat
Secluded location
Power is cut
Phone lines are cut
Someone investigates a strange noise
Someone runs up stairs instead of going out front door
Camera is the killer
Victims cower in front of a window/door
Victim locks self in with killer
Victim running from killer inexplicably falls
Toilet stall scene
Shower/bath scene
Car stalls or won't start
Cat jumps out
Fake scare
Laughable scare
Stupid discovery of corpse
Dream sequence
Hallucination/Vision
No one believes only witness
Crazy, drunk, old man knows the truth
Warning goes unheeded
Music detracts from scene
Death in first five minutes
x years before/later
Flashback sequence
Dark and stormy night
Killer doesn't stay dead
Killer wears a mask
Killer is in closet
Killer is in car with victim
Villain is more sympathetic than heroes
Unscary villain/monster
Beheading
Blood fountain
Blood hits camera
Poor death effect
Excessive gore
No one dies at all
Virgin survives
Geek/Nerd survives
Little kid lamely survives
Dog/Pet miraculously survives
Unresolved subplots
"It was all a dream" ending
Unbelievably happy ending
Unbelievably crappy ending
What the hell?