Rish Outfield's reviews
At times like these, I wish we had made up a couple more categories. Categories like "Fast-Forward Button Necessary," "Dirty Feeling After Viewing," "Impossibly Boring/Useless Subplot," "No Explanation of Important Plotpoint," and "Inconceivably Un-scary Villain." This movie was awful, but not in the same way that other slasher movies are awful. I hated it because of how dull it was, how it kept feeling like an Afterschool Special, how unmotivated the ‘horror' was, and how tempted I was just to turn it off. We've got another "Wings" star here--Crystal Bernard this time, but even if you're her biggest fan, don't consider this movie. Pointless dream-sequences abounded, repeatedly displaying the effects that would occur later in the show. Even the nudity, usually so pervasive (and entertaining) in this type of movie, was garishly absent. The villain, a cross between Andrew Dice Clay, Val Kilmer, and...well, Andrew Dice Clay, was never explained, so we don't know if he was a psycho, a ghost, or the figment of someone's imagination. Plus, worst of all, he would say the stupidest things like "I can't get no satisfaction," and would laugh, as if this was supposed to be either funny or scary (I couldn't tell which, because I was neither). When the movie was over, I was depressed that I had wasted almost an hour of my already pathetic life.
Best Scare: There were no scares, boys and girls, but there was a cool pus-squirting effect.
I'd Recommend It To: Someone who needs to be humbled. But not in your case.

The tyranist's thoughts
There really is nothing to recommend this movie. It is bland and slow through most of the plot. Then when the killer does show up and start killing people I uttered the biggest "What the Hell?" of my short career. Unfortunately, this movie starts out like it is going to be kind of cool and much better than a lot of little slasher films. Don't be drawn in. Use the remote whenever someone starts to sing and don't worry about turning this off half way through. You haven't missed a thing.