FAITHFUL QUESTIONS  (Doing the Lord’s Will )
 
 

         I recall an experience I had as I was completing my doctorate that
has taught me something about listening to God’s questions rather than
aggressively pursuing my own, no matter how righteous my questions
seem to be.

         I was just beginning my final year at Stanford, and I was not sure
how I would be able to accomplish all that needed to be done.

         One day the elders quorum president in the ward engaged me in
casual conversation.  He said that they were looking for an early-morning
seminary teacher to teach the youth in the ward and offhandedly
suggested that maybe I should do it.  My response was that I didn’t see
how I could possibly do it during the coming year, given all that I had to
do, and the conversation ended harmlessly enough.  However, for several
weeks I couldn’t seem to get the thought out of my mind:  “But what if
they call you, Alan?”  I had never turned down a calling in my life.  I had
always said to myself that I would accept callings, but I resisted the
thought of this calling.

         About three weeks later, as I sat in the temple renewing sacred
covenants with the Lord, promising him that I would do whatever he
asked, a thought from the Lord came into my mind:  “Would you even
teach early-morning seminary for me?”  Well, there he had me.  I
realized that I had been asking the wrong question.  My question had
been, “How can I finish the dissertation and move on to a university
assignment?”  The Lord was asking me:  “Are you interested in doing
my will more than your own?”  In my heart I responded first with real
embarrassment that I had been unrepentant and closed to what I now
realized had been his question of me, a question that I thought had
come from an unthoughtful and casual elders quorum president.  I
then promised the Lord that I would do whatever he wanted, even if
I never finished the dissertation.
 
         I was called to teach seminary the next Sunday.  It was one of
the most difficult assignments I have ever had.  I struggled to prepare
for those early-morning lessons.  The students were often not appreciative
of the sacrifice that I felt I was making, and the dissertation took an
additional semester to finish.

         I realize now that this experience led me to remarkable opportunities
to serve individuals who needed my particular approach.  I also see how
the Lord taught me about teaching, about the gospel, and about myself
through this experience.  As I look back, however, the most important
lesson for me from this experience is that if I am not careful I may become
so involved in pursuing my own questions that I may miss God’s questions
to me.  They come in many forms, and I must school my heart to be open
to them.
 

                                                (Speeches, 1995-96, p. 101-102)

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