WHEN I'M A LITTLE OLD LADY

      ___
     (___)         When I'm a little old lady
     /`   `\        Then I'll live with my children
    /  /"\  \           and bring them great joy.
  \_/o o\_/       To repay all I've had
      (  _  )            from each girl and boy
      `\ /`         I shall draw on the walls
   /\\V//\            and scuff up the floor;
  / /_ _ \ \       Run in and out
  \ \___/ /           without closing the door.
   \/== \/              I'll hide frogs in the pantry,
      ||   ||            socks under my bed.
      ||   ||        Whenever they scold me,
    ||___||            I'll hang my head.
   |_____|        I'll run and I'll romp,
        |||              always fritter away
      / Y \         The time to be spent
     `"`"`             doing chores every day.
                      I'll pester my children        ____
           When they are on the phone.     (___)
         As long as they're busy                 /`   `\
            I won't leave them alone.        /  /"\  \
        Hide candy in closets,                  \_/o o\_/
            rocks in a drawer,                        (  _  )
         And never pick up my clothes        `\ /`
            from the floor.                           /\\V//\
     Dash off to the movies                    / /_ _\ \
            and not wash a dish.               \ \___/ /
         I'll plead for allowance               \/===\/
             whenever I wish.                        ||   ||
      I'll stuff up the plumbing                   ||   ||
            and deluge the floor.                 ||___||
         As soon as they've mopped it,    |_____|
              I'll flood it some more.                 |||
          When they correct me,                  / Y \
                        I'll lie down and cry,         `"'"`
       ___           Kicking and screaming,
      (___)              not a tear in my eye.
      /`   `\         I'll take all their pencils
     /  /"\  \            and flashlights, and then
   \_/o o\_/         When they buy new ones,
       (  _  )             I'll take them again.
       `\ /`           I'll spill glasses of milk
    /\\V//\             to complete every meal,
    / /_ _\ \         Eat my banana and
    \ \__ / /                    just drop the peel.
     \/==\/          Put toys on the table,
        ||   ||                   spill jam on the floor,
        ||   ||               I'll break lots of dishes
      ||___||                         as though I were four.
     |_____|                    What fun I shall have,
          |||                 what joy it will be to
        / Y \        Live with my children....
       `"`"`                the way they lived with me!

                                     (author unknown)